Breaking Dawn highlights the difference between a plot about serious things, and taking yourself too seriously. Of course an author wants people to be emotionally invested in the characters they create. However that investment should come naturally and not be forced upon us through maudlin trudging.
Breaking down Breaking Dawn in one sentence: Edward the vampire does very little for an hour and a half and yet comes across less pathetic than the previous series entry while self absorbed Jacob finally carries a plot-line, and matures to 8th grade level while the world’s least desirable girl, Bella Swan, continues an unbroken streak of insecure and awkward dealings with everyone she knows- oh and the werewolves and vampires fight over a demon child for about 90 seconds.
When it comes to creating an entertaining movie, book, play… anything, one is often in modern times counseled to start things off with a bang. Something to interest and draw and an audience wider than just diehard… er, twihards. The opening scene of this movie- our first glimpse in quite some time into the fascinating world of vampires and werewolves, is a pointless scene about high heels. It’s followed by a nearly as pointless scene about Edwards past, which as far as we can tell has nothing to do with anything.
If you thought the Twilight series could not get more insular and niche, you were wrong. We suppose self-centered, self indulgent content should be expected in the fourth book of the series. After all, who’s going to be reading it if they are not very interested in the thinning plot. However this does not make for an exciting or well-rounded movie.
The Breaking Dawn formula:
- Three parts continuous awkward shots of Bella and everyone she knows
- One part low-budget super-speed blur effect borrowed from Smallville
- One part uninteresting, normal looking computer-generated wolves
- Mix liberally (but without action) and coat with white pancake makeup
Smooth move Edward, bringing Bella to have a private wedding night dance with Jacob by the woods. Isn’t that some sort of faux pas- or should we say faux PAW. (We know. Our humor is beyond belief.) Oh, and it is interesting to note that everyone is more excited about Bella’s wedding then Bella. The way they were giving standing ovations you would think she was a British Princess. That is literally the first half hour. Oh, not a word from our favorite character Carlisle… *sad*
The producers spice up the next drawn out, awkward honeymoon scenes with emo ballads. Sadly, as many have found out cooking, not all spices are good for the dish. It finally ends with Bella throwing up, realizing she is pregnant. It is a shock to everyone (who has not read the book or had the plot ruined in any of a million other ways). Did not Carlisle have that little “birds and bees” talk with Edward? And so ends the second half hour. Two down, one to go.
Stephenie Meyer’s writing style may not be everyone’s cup of tea. Maybe she made sense on those book pages. The movie tried to convey a lot of it with voiceovers, cross dissolves, jump cuts and imagery ridden montages. What is “imprinting” exactly?
Breaking Dawn is one of those times where moviemakers decide to split a profitable franchise book into two movies- and it doesn’t work (except to make money). Okay, we admit we were not expecting much at all. However, even if you are fan of this franchise you have to admit this three act movie was thin on action, answers, plot… and entertainment value. Very thin.