Top Ten (Street-Legal) Theme Vehicles

Whether it be for movies, TV or business promotion, specialty wheeled vehicles have been with us almost since Henry Ford’s first factory.  What we are going to focus on here are STREET LEGAL vehicles.  Not fantastical assemblages of mismatched pieces like the Batmobile from The Dark Knight.  We are talking vehicles that with little or no special permissions can drive down your street tomorrow.

(Not our street of course.  We do not have one.  No, up here in the ice it is treaded vehicles or nothing.  That is unless you can fly… but we digress…)

Number 10:  Captain America’s motorcycle –from the 1979 made for TV film starring Reb Brown.

Are rivets really necessary on those hubs? Using a 1970's plexiglass shield as a windshield was a good idea. Probably will not even slow a bullet down however.

Ahh the 1970’s.  For starters we do not know if Cap forgot that bleach fades colors.  His dark blue outfit here looks… er, powder blue.  But the vehicle was cool and gave cap an excuse to wear that AMAZINGLY intimidating helmet.

Number 9:  The Monkee-mobile from the 1966 TV show.

It is too bad they could not fit the whole engine in the vehicle.

Did you try reading that first sentence on the box? Not well constructed. And yes, the GTO ruled. But do you need to tell us? Does that not kind of take away some of the "in" factor?

Ah, the vagaries of fashion and trends.

Whether it was the Beatles, the Monkees or even Chekov from Star Trek, what is old can be new again!

Hey Justin Bieber, we found out when your outrageous hairstyle was first “in”.

Beiber…  What will he think of this hair a decade from now?

Number 8:  The Weinermobile

Hollywood is not the only place that constructs impractical vehicles around outrageous themes.  Oscar Meyer came up with this design after the Bologna-mobile was a public relations failure.

"Stay to the left of the cones for the giant mustard dispenser."

Can you find the Weinermobile in this parking lot?

Number 7:   The 1966 Batman TV show Batmobile.

This picture was so amazingly cool.  Just look at that shine.  Drive around in this and chicks WILL dig it.

Keep relaxing Adam West. Your Batmobile will forever be more street legal than that goofball version from Batman III. You know, the Val Kilmer one with the 12 foot vertical fin sticking up in the back? Yeah, the one that flopped back and forth on turns...

Number 6:  Green Hornet’s Black Beauty

Whether the 1960’s original or the new movie version, it is one intimidating sedan.

Okay, the car itself is street legal. However this version is festooned with more weapons than the 50 ton M1 Abrams tank!

What was with the 1960’s and all the cool custom vehicles that came out of that era?

Was it a singular time of character for comic book heroes?

What can be said to have come out of 2010?

  • Dumb comments from Hollywood actors?
  • Teen idol hair doos?
  • Vampire Obsession?

What incredible ideas will our heroes come up with next?

What amazing wheeled conveyance will they fight crime with in the future?

Number 5:  The Ark II RV from the 1976 show of the same name.

The premise for this gem? "A group of ethnically and er, species diverse scientists roam the pollution ravaged 25th century in their RV teaching surviving people valuable life lessons..." Its true!

Yes, they are accompanied by a super intelligent chimp!  This could only have flown on Saturday mornings.  Only those under 10 have skulls full of enough mush to swallow this premise without realizing they are being brainwashed.

Okay, there may not be any “streets” left in this Woodsey Owl nightmare of a future. However if some were unearthed those nice big wheels would not chew up any pavement.  (What are you picking up with that dish?  Echoes of Justin Beiber songs bouncing back from space?)

Number 4:    Cars from the 1970 show, UFO.

Is it futuristic?  Sort of.  Is it street legal?  Yeah sure.  Is it practical?  Well, one trip to your local supermarket in this baby will reveal some flaws.  Can you imagine what rogue shopping carts will do to that edge?

Do not forget those far out futuristic fashions. This guy is trying so hard to be manly... in front of his lavender car?!

(Yes, UFO was that sometimes strange show where all the girls on the moonbase wore metal mesh, -and purple widow's peak wigs...)

Number 3:  The Landmaster from the 1977 film Damnation Alley.

The film may not be a classic, but the vehicle has lived on in many other TV shows, commercials and what have you.  Can you resist a movie starring both Jan-Michael Vincent (a guy with not one but THREE first names) and George (A-Team) Peppard?

Oh, we can hear some of you now, "But is that thing really street legal?" Look, its got wheels. Hey, if that Weinermobile is street legal, this thing is too! (We have seen it in person, it is impressive.)

Number 2:  The Nightshade-mobile from the 1990 TV show The Flash.

The Nightshade was a 1950’s masked hero.  His car was this heavy 1950’s boat of a car.  It probably weighs as much as a modern truck.  It was made of a material we do not use anymore in cars, METAL.

Here's to you Nightshade. By putting flourescent lights in your grill and wheel wells you turned the ordinary into something heroic. (And started a trend that would take root in future movies like The Fast and the Furious.)

Number 1:  The EM-50 Urban Assault Vehicle from the 1981 film Stripes.

Sure, it looks all normal and happy pre-transformation. Just another RV.

But the thing can transform like er, a Transformer into an armor plated behemoth festooned with an anti-tank gun and flame throwers.

Oh did we mention it also has a missile turret? For the ability to travel in inconspicuous touring style AND hold off the Soviet army, the EM-50 is our number one street legal theme vehicle.

Top Ten Pretty Animated Shots Vol.02

It is time for another set of animated pictures that is easy on the eyes.  Making this top ten is a little like trying to become an actor.  Many try, but few make the cut.

We liked the visually hard edged rendering of the Enchantress Amora in Hulk Vs Thor.

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While this painting featured in the credits looks nothing like that hard edged version, it is still pretty.

Chun Li remains a crowd favorite – if the crowd hangs out huddled around an arcade Street Fighter machine.  ;)  Here she is from Street Fighter IV: The Ties That Bind.

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How does she keep that face so pretty after all those nose-crushing, lip-bashing fights?

Princess Aurora from Disney’s true classic Sleeping Beauty has time-tested stylized good looks.  Below she is dressed as the forest maiden “Briar Rose”.  We like that edged style.

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Naruto Shippuuden went downhill faster than Balloon Boy’s ill-fated, non-existent flight to nowhere.  Never-the-less, while it is no longer worth a take, it did have a purdy enemy ninja.

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What is her deadly secret? Uhh, you do not want to see her without make-up...

Our takes on Winx Club remain top hitters.  The latest is season 4 part 1.  In honor of that popularity we could not pass up including a picture of Flora. If you do not know who Flora is, step back from the Street Fighter machine for a minute or give Naruto Shippuuden a rest for a half hour.

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Jerrica Benton…  How we would like to see your Jem & The Holograms storyline with your deceived but true boyfriend Rio resolved.  We have been waiting since 1988…, so it is overdue.

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At least Jerrica and Rio reaffirmed their love in this final season trip to Greece. Hmm Jerrica, do you dress native like this for every destination? We want to travel with you!

Ariel, the little mermaid’s mother was Queen Athena.  A lot of people seem to be searching for her online.  She was quite pretty as seen depicted here from The Little Mermaid: Ariel’s Beginning.

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Mom's everywhere, let Queen Athena be an inspiration to you to keep in shape.

Huntik: Secrets and Seekers is pleasantly surprising most who watch it – including us!  So enough with the sad face Huntik Star Sophie Casterwill, you made the cut for this Top Ten.

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Did all of Sophie's training include how to look good scuba diving? Ahh, we think it must have.

Zhalia from Huntik is not giving us a long face below, that is her usual stern expression.  But inside she had a soft heart.  Awww.

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Bonus Poll Picture:

There was a singer in Batman: Mystery of the Batwoman who caught our eye.  She seemed to get a disproportionally large amount of close ups and screen time for a nameless background character.

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Is this supposed to resemble somebody in particular? If so comment who please.

Top Ten Pretty Animated Shots Vol.01

As you know, we here in the Fortress come across a lot of media.  When a character or picture strikes us as notably pretty we keep it in mind for a Top Ten.  We did this for live action media in Top Ten Pretty Shots Vol01:

Now volume one for animated media is ready to roll.

Fletchen from Visionaries was pretty on the inside and the outside.

Fletchen from Visionaries was pretty on the inside and the outside.

She became Leoric’s girlfriend and someday, probably his queen.  Good for you heroic leader.  We hope there are more like her.  Here is our take on Visionaries:

Jedi Aayla got dirty in this Clone Wars episode.

Jedi Aayla got dirty in this Clone Wars episode.

However, at least she was not shot in the back by a bunch of clone troopers who just received a coded signal from the emperor.  Ahh, wait, – about that…

The young ambassador from the Clone Wars "Trespass" episode was cute.

The young ambassador from the Clone Wars "Trespass" episode was cute.

Wait a minute, a young spunky female in the Star Wars universe?  Hmph, unlikely.

There is definitely a following for Jedi Luminara (left) seen here with Ahsoka

There is definitely a following for Jedi Luminara (left) seen here with Ahsoka.

You just have to get over Luminara’s green complexion.  Red and blue seem easier to swallow to some.  BTW, does she find that outfit cumbersome and a little tight for Jedi maneuvers?

Clone Wars' Ventress is not our cup of tea here in the Fortress, but we know she has a following amongst those who go for the extremely bad girls.

Clone Wars' Ventress is not our cup of tea here in the Fortress, but we know she has a following amongst those who go for the extremely bad girls.

At least her outfit is not cumbersome.  Tight, but not cumbersome.  Here is our take on Star Wars: The Clone Wars.

Sayoko from Code Geass.  This is her only expression.

Sayoko from Code Geass. This is her only expression.

We are not sure why we liked Sayoko from Code Geass.

Maybe it is her bland look or indescribable hair coloring.

Come on, what shade is that?  But whatever, it worked.

We have not watched Code Geass R2 yet, so we do not know if she widened her repertoire of expressions up from the solid one.  Sometimes it is not what you know, but how well you know it as they say in martial arts circles.

While we are on the tangential topic of hair, our next entry had loads of it.  Loads.

Euphie from Code Geass.  She looked prettier in some shots than others.

Euphie from Code Geass. She looked prettier in some shots than others. But she was earnest.

Earnest yes.  Idealistic?  Probably.  Naive?  Definitely.  A huge supporter of hair conditioning products?  Oh yeah.

Cecile from Code Geass.  The understated lady-like template.

Cecile from Code Geass. The understated ladylike template.

She wears a conservative uniform the whole first series until the last episode.  Then bam, out of nowhere it becomes quite evident that she spends all her time off-duty at the gym.

Kallen from Code Geass was the firey template.

Kallen from Code Geass was the firey template.

Fiery temperament, fiery passion, fiery convictions.  So she was hot on multiple levels.  Plus she was a great mech pilot.  (And she likes long walks on the beach.)

Villetta from Code Geass covers both the firey AND ladylike ends.

Villetta from Code Geass covers both the fiery AND ladylike ends.

We really like that feminine hat.  Take an intense warrior and throw in some amnesia and you have the makings of a classic plot twist.  It also leads to the guy taking shot in the stomach, just like real life!

Here is our take on Code Geass Season One.

BONUS PICTURE:

Euphie from Code Geass again.  But what about this picture?

Euphie from Code Geass again. But what about this picture?

We here in the Fortress were divided on whether or not this picture was pretty.  It is amazing how both sides vacillate back and forth.  Maybe a poll is in order.  Help us out here.  Not the character, just this particular picture of her.

It seems the tide has turned against this picture of Euphie.  Looks like a lot of you do not find it very pretty or perhaps like us you saw something in it just a little -er, off.  We will keep it open though.  Be heard.  Vote!

Check out Top Ten Animated Pics Vol. 2.

Top Ten Pretty Shots Vol.01

We analyze a lot of media here in the Fortress.  (Amongst all this monochromatic ice and crystal can you blame us?)  Some shots struck us as memorably pretty, but either there was no room for them in the take or we chose not to even make a take.

So here are 10 shots we thought were pleasing to the eye and not to be overlooked:

Melanie Thierry from Canone Inverso.  Not a great film in our opinion, but she sure looked good.

Melanie Thierry from Canone Inverso. A film we cared little about, but she sure looked good.

You may recognize Thierry from Babylon AD.  A film in which we did not feel strongly enough to write a take.

You may recognize Thierry from Babylon AD. Another film in which we were more interested, but still did not feel strongly enough to write a take.

Upon reexamination of those two above pictures we surmise an 87% chance of lip injections.

Michelle Ryan had the bad girl look some guys find appealing.

Michelle Ryan had the bad girl look some guys find appealing in Merlin.

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Reviewing the two above pictures we surmise there is a 96% chance Ryan has nailed the “confident bad-girl smirk”.

While we could take or leave Rise of the Lycans, Rhona Mitra left an impression.

While we could take or leave Rise of the Lycans, Rhona Mitra left an impression.

Katie McGrath is reason enough to watch Merlin.

Katie McGrath is reason enough to watch Merlin.

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There is a 64% chance that Mitra and McGrath are going to start a British trend in female stars with pretty, well-defined jaws.

Here is our take on Merlin Season 1.

Olga Kurylenko is easier on the eyes than her name is on the lips.  SHe has a versatile look that can go both hard and cute.

Olga Kurylenko is easier on the eyes than her name is on the lips. That aside, she has a versatile look that can go both hard and cute.

Here is our take on Quantum of Solace.

Kathleen Mealia stole the show in Au Pair III.  As Senator Palpatine said to young Anakin at the end of Phantom Menace, "We'll follow your career with great interest."

Kathleen Mealia stole the show in Au Pair III. As Senator Palpatine said to young Anakin at the end of Phantom Menace, "We'll follow your career with great interest."

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Despite the high probability of artificial parts, there is a 100% chance that Mealia is a hottie.

Here is our take on Au Pair III: Adventure in Paradise.